Signs You’re Not Resting — You’re Numbing

Rest isn’t optional. It’s vital.

Yet, in humanitarian work, rest often feels like a luxury we can’t afford.

We push through exhaustion, hoping a weekend binge-watch, scrolling social media, or zoning out in front of the TV will recharge us.

But here’s the truth: Not all rest is restful. Sometimes, what we call rest is really numbing.

What does numbing look like?

Numbing is a way to disconnect—from pain, anxiety, overwhelm, grief, or uncertainty.

It’s a survival mechanism that helps us cope in the short term but blocks true restoration.

Here are some signs you might be numbing instead of resting:

1. You feel restless, even while “resting”

Your body might be still, but your mind races. You scroll endlessly, switch tasks, or avoid silence.

The pause you crave feels impossible. Instead, you’re filling time with distraction.

2. You avoid emotions under the guise of “self-care”

When feelings like grief, frustration, or sadness bubble up, you suppress or distract yourself.

You tell yourself, “I just need to relax,” but what you’re really doing is sidestepping discomfort.

3. Your “rest” doesn’t restore your energy or mood

After your “break,” you wake up feeling just as drained—or more.

You struggle to reconnect with joy, motivation, or focus.

4. You isolate yourself or withdraw socially

You might retreat from connection, preferring solitude or distraction to vulnerable conversations.

This isolation may feel safe but often deepens exhaustion and loneliness.

5. You rely heavily on substances or behaviors to cope

Whether it’s caffeine, alcohol, overeating, or excessive screen time, these quick fixes can mask tiredness.

But they don’t replace deep, regenerative rest.

Why does this matter?

Numbing can quietly erode your well-being, resilience, and clarity.

For humanitarian leaders and staff—who are regularly exposed to trauma and pressure—this can lead to burnout, moral injury, and a loss of connection to purpose.

How to reconnect with true rest

1. Practice presence, not escape.
   Try to notice what you’re feeling—even the uncomfortable bits—without judgment.

2. Create intentional pauses.
   Schedule moments in your day for deep breaths, mindful movement, or simple silence.

3. Set boundaries around screen time and distractions.
   Give your nervous system a chance to settle.

4. Reach out and connect.
   Even a brief heartfelt conversation can ground and replenish you.

5. Allow grief and discomfort to surface.
   Rest doesn’t mean avoidance—it means allowing your whole self to be seen and held.

Restoring yourself is an act of resistance.

In a world that glorifies hustle and martyrdom, choosing genuine rest is radical.

It’s a way to reclaim your humanity—and your capacity to care.

If this resonates…

You’re not alone. And there are practices, communities, and tools designed for leaders like you who want to move from numbing to nourishing.

Holding space with care and solidarity — here’s to staying whole, together,

Kate

Thanks for reading The Olive Pages: Fieldnotes on care, clarity, and staying whole

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KRC provides coaching, psychosocial support, and organizational consulting to humanitarian professionals and mission-driven organizations worldwide. Based in lived experience and trauma-aware care, our work helps clients navigate burnout, moral injury, organizational change, and career transitions — while staying human in the process.